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Change Your Communication Pattern

Change Your Marriage by Changing Your Communication Pattern.



Is your communication focused primarily on how abusive you can be with your spouse?

Some say, "I cannot talk to my spouse. They will not listen". Do you really expect them to listen and heed your advice when your communication centers strictly on denigrating, belittling and berating them?


Change your mindset, and you can change your life. Change your communication pattern, and you can change your marriage.


Remember always that your spouse typically responds negatively or positively based on how they are treated. They have a sensitive heart. They are emotional beings. They can be broken or mended based on the nature of your words.


This is the law of nature and the law of life. Whatever we sow, that we shall also reap. If we sow tomatoes, we cannot reap carrot.


If we want to create a relationship of friendship and deep emotional connectivity with our spouse, we must employ the method that will make that result possible.

We do not get them to do better by highlighting their flaws and mishaps. No, we get them to do better by telling them how well they are doing.


We celebrate our spouse if we want them to manifest excellence We praise them if we want them to radiate with beauty We validate them if we want them to do better We affirm them if we want them persevere in well-doing

This is God's will for your marriage.

In Psalms 128: 3, we are admonished to create in our home the kind of atmosphere where our spouse can become, not a withering, but a "fruitful vine"


The Scripture is replete with instructions and admonitions regarding the creation of a happy home through words and behaviors that edify and enhance:

"Cherish". Deut. 24:5 "Respect" Ephesians 5:33 "Praise" Proverbs 31: 28 "Honor". 1 Peter 3: 7


Understandably, we hurt each other because of the sinful nature which we all inherit from being "born in sin and shapen in iniquity"(https://biblehub.com/psalms/51-5.htm). We possess a sinful nature that propels us to manifest hurtful words and demeaning behavior. But, it is possible and urgent that we change that.


My wife and I have found victory over this compelling urge to destroy each other by bowing low before the Infinite God and pleading to Him for help, entreating Him to "remove our stony heart and replacing it with a heart of flesh" (Ezekiel 36:26).


God heard our feeble cry and responded miraculously. We now live to praise, adore, and celebrate each other. We still have our disagreements and misunderstandings, for this sinful nature exists within us and always will until that great day when our "mortal body shall put on immortality and our corruption, incorruption" (1 Corinthians 15:53)

But God can grant us the victory each day that we commit our lives to him afresh. We learned the importance of "dying daily" (1 Corinthians 15:31) so we can have daily victories.


I invite you to fill this prescription and swallow this self-same capsule. Bow your head in silence before the inspecting eye of the Living God. Ask Him earnestly to remove from your soul the roots and fibers of sin, and breathe therein His sweet, majestic, and transformational Holy Spirit.


If you embark on this venture genuinely, He will hear from heaven, fill you with His Joyous Spirit and Heal your soul. Then, because of this supernatural encounter, your heart will beat with a divine pulse, and your marriage will never be the same again.


You will look upon your spouse through new lenses, as an emotional being to be loved and cherished. Subsequently, you will enjoy a marital bliss and an elevated existence to which mortals dream to aspire.




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